Falling Down a Wormhole


I’ve been away for a while.

Some of you have asked where I’ve been. The thing is, I’m not sure. I do know that almost exactly one year ago my first grandchild was born, and for a wonderful time Dashiell and his parents lived with us during maternity leave. About the time they moved back to New York, my other daughter came to the big city to take a job. And for a wonderful time she and her husband and their adorable French bulldog puppy moved into the guest room. But where the time went, what I’ve been doing—I can’t quite say.

I think I fell into a family wormhole. I have felt very lucky to have this time with my daughters, my sons-in-law, my grandson, my granddog. But it’s been like time traveling—back to the years when you’re working crazy hours on the front end of your career and the baby is sick and up in the night and all you do is run to keep up with the whirl. Pam and I had been empty nesters for nearly ten years. We had gotten gloriously used to our own daily routine. But—no more of that!

Pam and I had a well worn ritual that began about 5:15 am: get up, make tea, settle into our chairs for sacred reading (she would read the first half of the text while I ate a little fruit and drank my tea, then she would pass the book to me), sit for twenty minutes of wordless prayer, go out for exercise, come back, make coffee. That’s when I would go to my office and write for an hour or so. There were days in the last year when we could manage some of that, but the whole rhythm of our lives was different. I took a sabbatical from blogging and learned to pray on the fly.

But the forces that swept me away seem to have brought me home again—or nearly so. Now seemed like a good time to sit down and write. I have learned some things along this way. Mostly how to live the life that is given you, even if that new life overturns some of the cherished parts of your old life. And that the gifts of life—precious hours and days with your adult children who actually want to share their lives with you—come at a cost; you have to give up having life on your own comfortable terms. Otherwise you grow into an old scarecrow of a man.

It feels good to write about that. Again.

28 Responses to Falling Down a Wormhole
  1. Ellie Massie
    January 1, 2016 | 6:29 pm

    Welcome back! You have been sorely missed.

  2. David
    January 1, 2016 | 6:42 pm

    I’ve missed your voice! God bless you and the good work you do.

  3. Marilyn Topar
    January 1, 2016 | 6:56 pm

    A super, positive piece on life-changing events! All wonderful things, albeit a bit disruptive – you and Pam are doing a grand job!! So happy you’re blogging again!

  4. Ingrid Ruppalt
    January 1, 2016 | 7:08 pm

    You have been missed- so glad you are writing again

  5. Cindy
    January 1, 2016 | 8:24 pm

    Welcome back…have missed your blogs!!

  6. Ann Koberna
    January 1, 2016 | 8:35 pm

    David, I welcome the return of your God given experience-wisdom and your voice!!!

    You just wrote, “you have to give up having life on your own comfortable terms”. BRAVO!! To truly be immersed in the joys &
    the messiness of life, in order to invest in each day’s opportunities ,
    that is the absolute truth. Thank you, David.

  7. Sandy Oldfield
    January 1, 2016 | 10:11 pm

    I love the line about learning to live the life you’re handed! We love our quiet reading mornings but we also relish being jumped on by grandchildren in bed. The trick is being able to find the holiness in both.

  8. Charlie Hotchkiss
    January 1, 2016 | 10:55 pm

    David, glad that you are back. We missed hearing from you. Happy New Year to all of you and we look forward to hearing more from you in 2016.

  9. Matt
    January 1, 2016 | 11:33 pm

    Look what the cat dragged back in! Hallelujah!
    On the topic of prioritizing it seems you have made very good choices for both yourself and the future. People, especially those that don’t live in a commuting town, find it fascinating that I love my train commute so much. But otherwise I’d never make quiet time for myself. I love walking into my house and being engulfed by the pandemonium, but would love it a lot less so without the silence before.

  10. Susan Art
    January 2, 2016 | 6:50 am

    Well said!

  11. Tiffany
    January 2, 2016 | 9:16 am

    What a lovely piece and a great reminder to me to enjoy the waning days with my college kids at home! Thank you!

  12. Marty Gilbert
    January 2, 2016 | 11:26 am

    Thank you David for blogging us out of the aftermath of family swarms and back to the path of adventure

  13. Marty Gilbert
    January 2, 2016 | 11:29 am

    Thank you David for blogging us out of the family swarm aftermath and back to the path to adventures!

  14. Barrie Summers
    January 2, 2016 | 1:21 pm

    So glad you are back. Blessings to all of you for this New Year

  15. Barbara Miley
    January 2, 2016 | 2:03 pm

    Thank you, David, for the wisdom of your newest posting. I’ve missed you, too, along with all others who read you faithfully. Glad you’re back to join the rest of us in our journey on Planet Earth. :)) We need your guidance and comments. Peace for the coming year 2016. Shalom. 🙂

  16. Kim Truong
    January 2, 2016 | 2:31 pm

    Thank you so much for writing again! I’m Just so glad I checked your web site again today. You’ve been missed.
    Happy New Year and God bless.

  17. Gwen
    January 2, 2016 | 3:12 pm

    Welcome back. Have missed your postings.

  18. clark johnson
    January 2, 2016 | 3:38 pm

    David and Pam, These are and have been the very precious times in your life, your children a grandchild and a wonderful family both personal and church wise. We are all linked together, at St Luke’s, in one of life’s great blessings! Clark

  19. Michael Anderson
    January 2, 2016 | 6:35 pm

    Welcome back David. I’ve missed you and your wisdom. The way I see it, you’ve lived your teaching, taking time to attend to what really matters. Eager to hear what you’ve learned in this new era of life.

  20. Ginny Lovas
    January 2, 2016 | 7:09 pm

    So glad you are back! You, and those who respond to your blog have taught me much! God Bless you and your wonderful family, grandson, and granddog!

    Was just thinking about our wonderful grand niece and grand nephews who joined us for Christmas Dinner! What a great gift we were given to have them as part of our lives.

    Ginny & Joe

  21. Bill Baird
    January 2, 2016 | 10:10 pm

    It will be delightful to hear your thoughts and expand ours through your wisdom! And good news — you’re not a scarecrow!

  22. Pam Anderson
    January 3, 2016 | 8:17 am

    You’ve lead the way in finding your way back. Like you, I’m enjoying my new role as a grandparent and parent to adult kids, but it’s time to find time to write again. Thank you!

  23. Irma Fralic
    January 3, 2016 | 4:09 pm

    Nice to hear from you again. You are an inspirational writer and your perspective awakens my soul.

  24. Midge Shepard
    January 3, 2016 | 6:51 pm

    Glad to read your writings!

  25. Sue Poulson
    January 4, 2016 | 6:48 pm

    This writing so resonated with me as after 10 months of living together, my son, his wife and their 10 cats are moving out in a week. It has been hectic, uplifting, frustrating and fun. We were all living together when my husband died in August -truly a blessing!

    (As a reminder I am Connie’s friend from CA who was on the wonderful Israel trip).

    • David Anderson
      January 4, 2016 | 7:27 pm

      I remember you! (My mothers maiden name was Paulson–close to yours, so I remember.) Thanks for checking in

  26. Lynne
    February 19, 2016 | 2:28 pm

    While looking for something else I happened upon this blog and have been reading several of the posts. I am impressed. This one however, I feel compelled to say something as all of you seem to be reacting to your response of your children moving in with you (positively or negatively) … But, I have a different perspective, perhaps Gods intentions had nothing to do with your needs … It may be all about your children, grandchildren, that God wanted them to spend time with “YOU” for your wisdom, your mentorship, your guidance … He may have used You to provide support for their future soul and/or personal life needs … I sincerely believe He uses each of us as Tools to help each other… we become His silent hands/voice … and most often we won’t ever know when we are the most help to others/strangers when they need it.

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